Taking the First Step

After my gallbladder attack I was referred back to my primary care doctor for a referral to a surgeon. During my visit with him he asked, “Why are you so big?” I thought, ‘Hmm… what? Really? You’re are just going to say it like that, huh?’ I meekly replied, “I don’t know.” He then explained to me that my weight was now starting to cause chronic conditions (i.e. the gallstones) so “let’s do something about that” he said. He then asked if I would like to start seeing one of the nutritionists on staff at his office. At this point my head was sort of reeling. No doctor has ever openly addressed my weight and I have seen a lot of doctors. I wasn’t comfortable discussing it because I never had to do so in the past. I am an agreeable person, sometimes to a fault, so without thinking I said “OK, I would be interested in doing that.” They made me an appointment and on the drive home from his office I started crying.

This is an excellent example of why I am obese, I was crying because I was afraid of crying in front of a stranger. I knew that if I started seeing a nutritionist that I would have to talk about my weight and my health history and I know that I was going to cry! Now, if that’s not a tell-tale sign of “having issues” I am not sure what is! I then immediately starting with the excuses and doubt. I thought, ‘OK I am going to go in there and they are just going to try and sell me a bunch of stuff. It’s probably a money-making thing that they run on all the fat patients!’ and I wanted to cancel the appointment before I even went. It was my husband who talked me down. He convinced me that I needed to at least try it and if it was as terrible as I thought then I didn’t have to go back but if it seemed like it would be helpful to me then this could be just what I needed to save my life. That’s my husband, my hero… he’s in the business of saving my life and for that I am forever grateful.

So, March 18, 2008, I had my first appointment with my nutritionist, Jodi. I soon as I meet her I immediately knew that Ramses was right… he’s right more often than I like to admit. Jodi’s warmth, enthusiasm, and great sense of humor made me feel at ease. She is one of those people that you meet for the first time and feel like you’ve known her your whole life. I was weighed in and giving a BIA and she spent well over 2 hours with us explaining the program and what was expected of me. I left feeling empowered and confident.

I now eat 6 times a day and keep a detailed log. I have certain numbers to reach each day in several different food categories. I can’t lie, the first week was very difficult. It took a ton of planning and scheduling and I really missed eating all the junk I was before. I have been on the program for about 2 months and I a happy to report that it has gotten much, much easier. During this 2 month time span I had surgery to have my gallbladder removed and spent the last month eating whatever I wanted. So I am starting again. The surgery knocked me a little back down the mountain but knowing that reaching the point I was at before is possible to achieve I have confidence I will make it back to where I was and further!